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What are my best qualities?

Updated

Your best qualities are the ones other people notice and come back to you for. To find them, ask a few friends two questions: "What do you come to me for?" and "When was I at my best?". The quality that shows up twice is one of yours.

Good qualities in a person, with examples

Ten good qualities and what they look like
QualityWhat it looks like
KindnessYou do favors nobody asked for
HonestyYou say the true thing, kindly
HumorPeople leave a hard day with you laughing
LoyaltyYou show up when it costs you something
FairnessYou treat everyone the same, including people who can't help you
GratitudeYou notice the good and say thank you
CuriosityYou ask the second question
PerseveranceYou finish what you start
CourageYou speak up when it's uncomfortable
HopeYou expect the best and work for it

Some qualities are common everywhere. Across 40 countries, the strengths people most often said were "most like me" were kindness, fairness, authenticity, gratitude and open-mindedness (Park, Peterson and Seligman, reported in Seligman and colleagues, 2005). Common doesn't mean ordinary: what matters is how yours shows up.

Why ask rather than guess

On qualities we care about, our own view bends toward what we hope or fear, so the people who know us often judge those traits more accurately (Vazire and Carlson, 2011).

Two questions to send

Quick question: what do you come to me for? And when was I at my best? One moment is enough.

Add a friend's first name and get a link to text them. Each friend shares a moment, no app or sign-up. You see the strengths that come back. Free.

Ask my friends

Questions

How do I know my best qualities?

Ask a few friends what they come to you for and when they saw you at your best. The quality that shows up in more than one answer is one of yours.

What are the best qualities in a person?

Across 40 countries, the strengths people most often say are most like them are kindness, fairness, authenticity, gratitude and open-mindedness. What makes one yours is the moments where people saw it.

How do I describe my good qualities?

Name the quality and give one moment that shows it: "My friends say I'm calm. When our flight was canceled, I had us rebooked before the line formed."

Sources